Reed advises victims of conflicts to express their concerns about their adversary's behavior in as calm and professional a manner as possible. "You don't want to walk into that conversation hurling accusations," he says.

Dinkin adds that if you address your adversary in a forceful, confrontational way, he will go on the defensive, react just as strongly as you, and the conflict will only worsen. "If the person sees you're frustrated, they have more control over you," says Dinkin. "If you demonstrate that you're not frustrated, you're more in control of the situation."

To avoid a heated confrontation, Dinkin recommends asking your adversary questions about his behavior that bothers you. For example, if his listening to loud music during the workday inhibits your ability to focus and hampers your productivity, Dinkin says you could open the conversation by asking why he likes to listen to music while he works. If a coworker is taking credit for your work, for example, you might ask why he didn't note your contribution to the project when he was talking about it with your boss. The object of asking these questions, says Dinkin, is for the victim to get a better understanding of why their adversary engages in a particular behavior.