Well, first, this man is looking to hire a wingwoman--to help him meet other women. Then, he feels it necessary to explain what a wingwoman is. (It's "a woman who goes into a social situation with the purpose of helping the guy or guys she is with meet women.")

But what really gets me about this ad is the fact that he describes himself as a "classy professional." Because nothing says classy like having to hire women to make other women think that women like you. Be still my beating heart!

Anyone? Well, if you still need a couch, would you go for this ad, which offers a free sofa "if you can bend time and/or space."

The lister explains: "So why am I listing in for free? Because I am pretty sure it is physically impossible to remove this thing from my second story bedroom down the narrow hallway, down the narrower staircase and out the front door of my little Victorian duplex. How did we get it up here in the first place? Magic... well, it did involve taking several doors off the hinges, 4 people, and about 3 1/2 hours of cursing the gods. However, I don't feel like doing it all again, and I'm not about to have a stranger (no offense) taking apart my house for a deal on a sofa."