This is, what, sarcasm? It's hard to tell when the primary argument is so overblown.

Most of the world's phone manufacturers have finally coalesced around a single standard for docking connectors--micro USB.

Wait, which one is micro-USB? The tiny one the Macalope's always putting in the wrong way or the tiny one the Macalope's always putting in the wrong way?

Aside from anything mandated by the physical design of the new iPhone...

Like the fact that making it so thin precludes using the existing dock connector and the fact that Lightning is simply . The ability the put the plug in either way alone is worth at least $29 to the Macalope, anyway.