According to a recent joint study by Catalyst, the Families and Work Institute, and the Center for Work and Family at Boston College, 74 percent of women executives have a spouse/partner who is employed full-time. By contrast, 75 percent of male executives have a spouse/partner who stays home full-time -- strong evidence that, despite progress in attitudes toward domestic workloads, women still predominantly bear the brunt of striking a balance between career and home. And when it comes to advancing in the tech industry while starting a family, timing can be a significant barrier.

"In order to get to the top of the food chain, you have to own something big and ugly -- an ERP implementation, for example, or a slot machine implementation at a casino," says Carol Pride, CIO of Pinnacle Entertainment, a gaming company that operates casinos throughout North and South America. "Often, the first big-and-ugly project coincides with the time one is trying to raise young children."

Pride, who credits her "unusually supportive spouse" as instrumental to her success, cautions against trivializing the balance between work and family at this critical junction. "Women often realize, rationally, that children are more important than companies," she says. "But if you don't do the big and ugly, then it ends up hindering you later."

Proving one's professional fortitude through this rite of passage has long been a tradition in IT, and though results-driven promotion incentives are certainly justifiable, many companies stand to lose out in the long term by keeping their project philosophy "big and ugly" -- especially those that fail to play a role in helping employees strike a fruitful work/family balance. And the chief step companies can take to ensure that experienced, knowledgeable workers stay onboard through this life transition is to offer telecommuting and flexible work hours whenever possible.

"Twenty years ago, it was impossible for a woman to be on the soccer field and at a meeting at the same time, but now technology makes that possible," says Carly Fiorina, former CEO of Hewlett-Packard and the first woman to run a Fortune 20 company. During her tenure, Fiorina says, HP expanded its flex-time, job-share, and work-at-home programs. "Goodness, if we can outsource call centers in India, we can help people have virtual offices and flexible work hours."