There are other ways as well, but we need not discuss how they work, but I will tell I have zero day exploit I purchase off my friend Yuri that it is better to remain my little secret (this cost me a hundred thousand credit cards, which was a lot but what I got from Heartland Credit Systems was much greater ... so what if Yuri was overpaid, he will remember that I am generous when he finds the next great exploit).

Now my little friend is busy. He is sending me everything from Mr. Gibbs' hard drive. I could clean out Gibbs' bank account but what fun would that be? His bank would simply cover the loss. No, much better to just hold Gibbs' computer hostage. He is now seeing a pop-up that says the following: "My dear Mr. Gibbs, I could clean out your bank account. I could send porn to all your friends so it looks like you sent it. I could do anything I want. But this is your lucky day. You will have noticed by now that you cannot access your files. All I want you to do is pay me [US]$10 a month and I will let you have access. Just send me a message at vladimiryourbase@gmail.com confirming you will pay within 24 hours and your files will be made available. If you fail to confirm, if you run any kind of malware removal tool, if you attempt to make any system changes your hard disk will be wiped clean."

Why do I do this? Because I can. I have lots of money and keeping an army of zombies that each drip a little money my way is better than making -- how do you say it? -- too many wave. I have more than 5,000 people doing this so it is good business. Da?

Maybe I will be on your PC next. Will you ever get rid of me? As we say, "Kogdá rak na goré svístnet" -- when the lobster will whistle on the mountain" (I told you we have a thing about lobsters). Or as you say, "when pigs fly." Have a nice day, or as we say, Do svidaniya! ("Till the next meeting.") 

Vlad isn't in Ventura, Calif. You can send him your thoughts at vladimiryourbase@gmail.com. Gibbs is still at backspin@gibbs.com.