Samberg began by stating his earnest intention to discuss "some key issues."
"The first is the importance of authentic identity: I am Mark Zuckerberg," said Samberg, placing his right hand over his heart. "And under this sweatshirt are rock-solid, cut-and-greased abs."
Fake Zuck then went on to talk about user growth, bragging that Facebook now has more members than the population of Europe, the cast of Glee, and the number of people "who claim they came up with Facebook--BURN!"
So how many members does Facebook have exactly? Don't ask, Samberg warned: "Myspace asked a lot of questions, and I chloroformed it, drove it out to the desert, and put a bullet in the back of its skull."